Archive for June, 2005

28
Jun
05

^goodbye…

How do you love someone
That hurts you oh so bad
With intentions good
Was all he ever had

But how do I let go when I’ve
Loved him for so long and I’ve
Given him all that I could
Maybe love is a hopeless crime
Giving up what seems your lifetime
What went wrong with something once so good

How do you find the words to say
To say goodbye (find the words to say good bye)
When your heart don’t have the heart to say
To say goodbye (find the words to say good bye)

I know now I was naive
Never knew where this would lead
And I’m not trying to take away
From the good man that he is

But how do I let go when I’ve
Loved him for so long and I’ve
Given him all that I could
Was it something wrong that we did
Because others infiltrated
What went wrong with something once so good

How do you find the words to say
To say goodbye (find the words to say good bye)
When your heart don’t have the heart to say
To say goodbye (find the words to say good bye)

Is this the end (end) are you sure (are you sure)
How should you know when you’ve never been here before
It’s so hard (hard) to just let go (just let go)
When this is the one and only love I’ve ever known

So, how do you find the words to say ( when it’s been so long )
To say goodbye (find the words to say good bye)(to say good bye)
When your heart don’t have the heart to say (mmmmmmmm yeah ohhhh yeah)
To say goodbye (find the words to say good bye)

(Alicia Keys)

😥 …

xoxo

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27
Jun
05

^looking in…

You look at me and see the girl
Who lives inside the golden world
But don’t believe
That’s all there is to see
You’ll never know the real me

She smiles through a thousand tears
And harbours adolescent fears
She dreams of all
That she can never be
She wades in insecurity yeah
And hides herself inside of me

Don’t say she takes it all for granted
I’m well aware of all I have
Don’t think that I am disenchanted
Please understand

It seems as though I’ve always been
Somebody outside looking in
Well, here I am for all of them to bleed
But they can’t take my heart from me
And they can’t bring me to my knees
They’ll never know the real me

(Mariah Carey)

xoxo

27
Jun
05

makan banyak…

Yesterday Papa had to work. Yeah, on a Sunday! They had some stock count or something. Poor thing, but we still managed to meet after he finished work. =)
We went to Jusco Wangsa Maju. Of all the places eh? He just got his practical allowance and guess what, he bought me four pairs of shoes plus 3 blouses from SEED!!!! =D

All total to about rm200+ worth of stuff. Hehe. Now u people might think I'm a mata duitan. I'm not, okay! Seriusly, I don't 'ask' for things! Papa bought himself an acne cleansing set n a t-shirt too.

We ate really banyyk yesterday. As usual. At Johnny's, I had Tomyam Mihun and mixed Lod Chong (it's a type of desert) while Papa had Spicy Fried Rice and Banana Split! Plus we even ordered a plate of bbq chicken. Hehehehe. Not only that, we then headed to McD and had large fries! =D Mana tak gemok kan? But we enjoyed ourselves. A lot. Thank you sayang, thank you soo much for making me happy when you know I'm down. Love you…mmmmuuaaahh!

Urmm, you might be curious about why I'm down? Well, it's nothing. I'm just dreading the thought of having to go back to classes in a week! Sigh. Doesn't quite bring back good memories, especially after flunking a few papers! :'(

Time flies huh? I guess I just have to face it and pull up my socks. Can't play around anymore. I wasn't playing around at all before laa! But…well, you get what I mean right? Though I do miss the company of Zana and Nanab! =)
Plus, I think I'm getting fatter and it damn stresses me out!!! I exercise everyday but I don't know why la. Sheesh.

Oh, last Thursday, I went to Sungei Wang with Sis Sal. I wanted to get a mmc reader. I ended up buying not only that but also a 256mb Pendrive plus a Photoshop software cd. hehehe. I memang suka membazir duit!
But the thing is, I don't really know how to use the Photoshop software, yet. Haha. Faizal, my cousin spent half an hour teaching me how to make a simple collage of photos using paint which was actually very easy but I yang lembab gila. I'm very very slow in the IT department. I think both him and his girlfriend, Alice (who by the way, went back to Sabah already. isk..isk) would know that. And not to forget Gan also laa. hahaha. Kesian mereka. But I managed to do it anyway and added some effects using the Photoshop software. =D  Uploaded them in my Friendster page. Please excuse me, I'm only an amateur. Hehe.
I wonder what else I can do. Hehe. *wink*

Papa smsed me this morning and out of the blue he said that he doesn't wanna work anymore and that doesn't make me any happy at all. Why must he give up now? Sigh.

xoxo

19
Jun
05

can’t help it…i AM a bitch…

Bitchology

When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch.
When I stand up for those I love, they call me a bitch.
When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way, they call me a bitch.

Being a bitch means I won't compromise what's in my heart.
It means I live my life MY way.
It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak against it, I am defined as a bitch.
The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being everyone's maid, or when I act a little selfish.
It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I "should" be.
I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!

So try to stomp on me, try to douse my innerflame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I holdwithin me.
You won't succeed.
And if that makes me a bitch, so be it.
I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.

B – Babe
I – In
T – Total
C – Control of
H – Herself

B = Beautiful
I = Intelligent
T = Talented
C = Charming
H = Hell of a Woman

B = Beautiful
I = Individual
T = That
C = Can
H = Handle anything

Send this to 5 women to put a smile on theirface!! "If you can't do something right, get a woman to do it."

Have a great day!!

Yeah man! Who ever wrote this is a damn smartass. And now I'm actually proud to be a BITCH! haha…

xoxo

18
Jun
05

tribute.

Dedicated to those who have touched my life in enormous ways…

marlene azlia
–> Yes, yes, my lil' sis! This girl has the maturity of a 25 year old and I mean it in a good way! I know I can always count on her for some sound advice, whenever and wherever. The perfect listener, the perfect lil' sis. Yes, she does have her 'bad side' okay. Hehe. But she has never failed to be there for me when I needed her. Late night talks and laughs with her are the moments I treasure always. Wish I could be like you. (I mean more matured laa. Don't perasan so much. hee..)

marc shahbudin
–> My lil' bro. Always will be my lil' bro eventhough he's taller than me. Have a very special bond with this fella. He'll be there for me whenever wherever. And he'll beat me up to teach me a lesson whenever wherever too. hehe. The perfect lil' bro to have. We would stay up all night talking to each other about stuff and give each other stupid and sometimes good advice. ;D He's normally the second person I go to cry my heart out (the 1st one is Akey laa..).

akhiriatul hafliza
–> My bestest bestest friend in the whole wide world! she's d epitome of a true fren…been with me thru thick n thin…my confidante…i could call her at wee hours of d day n could still count on her 2 be there with no grudge at all…we laugh n cry 2getha…even during my toughest time…she stood by me…n it has been 7 years of wonderful friendship…wish i could have 700 more..!

mohd nazri
–> my kambing…d love of my life…my best fren…my enemy…my evrythin…i luv d fact dat i can b myself wen i wit him…i can laugh n cry my heart out! he's seen me on my ugliest days…n days wen i felt 'pretty'…heee…pampers me like a baby…acceptin me 4 who i am…n supports me in wuteva i do…my pillar of strength…lifting me up wenever im down…happy wen im happy…n not 2 mention…scolds me once in a while wen i need it…huhu! we've been thru hell of a lot 2getha…! still have much more 2 face though…but Alhamdulillah…we're still goin strong…

faizal
–> my absolutely super duper couz…he's a man of wisdom…huhu…d 1 i can count on 2 make me laugh wen im feelin blue…n smile with me wenever im happy! i can depend on him 4 advice on practically anythin…d best thing is he's my couz…d best cousin a gurl could ever ask 4…!*winks*

my ex-debate team( u know who u guyz r… =D )
–> these guyz r d greatest…tanx gan, 4 literally pulling me into d team! i've had d best moments in my life with this bunch of crazy ppl! hehehe…no 2 mention…they've saw me thru my own crazy period (breaking down etc etc)…my apple n mentos eating period…d only ones who have seen me dance on top of d table…woops! hehe..n surprisingly…they're still my frenz! my truly great frenz! my party ppl…*winks*

nur diana
–> my very optimistic best fren! i admire her 4 her strength n determination…she alwiz teaches me 2 look on d bright side of things…n assures me dat she's alwiz there 4 me no matter wut…dis gurl can kick a***! one tough gurl…we've known each other since we were in std 6! alhamdulillah…she's really an amazing person 2 b frenz with…

salehah
–> my 'twin'…ppl used 2 call us 'belangkas' n skool…huhu…both of us have so many similarities dat sumtimes we can read each others' mind! hehe…we've shared a lot 2getha…from secrets 2 private jokes…we've fought many times…but she's juz d type of fren dat u can't let go of…

zanariah
–> sumtimes i feel unworthy of dis gurl's frenship…cuz she's so damn smart! but she's very down 2 earth…softhearted…nmpk je cam ganas…huhu…my best fwen in uitm…urmm…she can tell u dat i'm a cry baby…i cry bout almost evrythin…huhu…but she's alwiz rite there 4 me…comfortin me…plus both of us can laugh bout almost anythin!!…u can learn a lot from dis gurl…seriusly…a wonderful fren n person inside out…

sharifah zainab
–> my lil singaporean fwen! she's very very very optimistic bout things…i take my hats off 2 her cuz she has alwiz been able 2 put truth in d saying 'evry cloud has a silver lining'…hehe…unlike me…n she has never fail 2 b there 4 me…in any circumtance…

I want ya'll 2 know dat u guyz r d best ppl in d whole world…i thank ya'll frm d bottom of my heart 4 stickin by me all dis while…! i know i can b a pain in d a*** most of d times…tanx 4 puttin up wit my craziness…tanx 4 acceptin me 4 who i am…tanx 4 teachin me so many thingz bout life…i've learnt a lot from u guyz…bout d side of life dat i never knew existed…witout u guyz i wouldn't b where i am now…i wouldn't b d person i am now…

I also want ya'll 2 know dat i'm alwiz there 4 ya'll…anytime…anywhr…u can count on me if ya'll need a fren…honestly…remember dat!!

I may not call, sms, email etc ya'll evryday…but do remember dat ya'll have a very special place in my heart…i have been blessed 2 have ppl like ya'll in my life…Alhamdulillah..

I LOVE YA'LL…truly…
mmuuuaaahhhhhhhh!

xoxo

14
Jun
05

^every time…

I'm afraid I'm starting to feel
What I said I would not do
The last time really hurt me
I'm scared to fall in love
Afraid to love so fast'
Cause every time I fall in love
It seems to never last

But every time your love is near
And every time I'm filled with fear
'Cause every time I see your face
My heart does begin to race every time

One half wants me to go
Other half wants me to stay
I just get so all confused
I'm scared to fall in love
Afraid to love so fast

'Cause every time I fall in love
It seems to never last
But every time your love is near
And every time I'm filled with fear'
Cause every time I see your face
My heart does begin to race every time

I'm scared to fall in love
Afraid to love so fast
'Cause every time I fall in love
It seems to never last

Every time your love is near
And every time I'm filled with fear
'Cause every time I see your face

Could it be that this will be the one that lasts
The fear does start to erase every time
Oh could it be that this will be the one that lasts
For all my times
For all my times

(Janet Jackson)

xoxo

13
Jun
05

roti tissue.

Today I've discovered the wonders of eating roti tissue with dhal curry thanks to my Lene, yummy!! I normally eat it just like that because it's sweet and thought it wouldn't go well with dhal or any curry for that matter. hehe. But it turns out I was wrong! Thanks Lene.(there you go, the much requested 1 second of fame in my blog, lil' sis!*wink*)

Papa's big sis, Kak Zana gave birth to a lovely baby boy yesterday! Adam Daniel Iman. Very very cute and very healthy at 3.5kgs!! hehe…

I have exactly 4 weeks of hols to go and then it's back to my books and classes etc etc. Sigh. Somehow I dread the whole idea…

xoxo




Peek – A – Boo !

NONSENSICAL THOUGHTS OF MINE.

This is mine. Not yours.
So keep your censuring to yourself, thank you.

DON'T JUDGE ME.
YOU'RE NOT GOD.

feeling The current mood of hunnylis at www.imood.com at the moment.

Make my day !

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